How a Time of Solitude Helped Me Rediscover Myself
Before my divorce I viewed solitude very differently than how I do now. I thought it meant being lonely. With time I came to realize this belief was so much further than what I initially understood to be true. As I was learning how to navigate life on my own and adapt to my "new normal" in light of my divorce "solitude" took on a whole new meaning for me.
Since I was in a long-term relationship for over a decade, it was important for me to learn how to embrace being single. Rather than view this time as one of defeat, I remained committed to rediscover who I am as a person. When I was married, I lost a sense of who I truly was and this showed up in many other aspects of my life.
Today it's so easy to get lost in meaningless distractions which prevent us from connecting with ourselves. I eliminated various things that were not adding value - to include toxic relationships and situations - from my life to enhance my ability to focus on my personal growth. This helped me to enhance my ability to think for myself rather than conform to being a certain way other people expected me to be. It also helped me to regain perspective on who I am and what I truly want in my life.
One of the most important ways I learned how to find myself again was by carving out time to be to myself. In doing so, I slowly but surely began to abandon the limiting beliefs, doubts and fears I acquired over the course of my life - and were reinforced by societal expectations. The more I did this, the more comfortable I learned to be with myself, accepting my flaws and imperfections.
This process taught me a valuable lesson in that I learned that the most important relationship I can have is the one I have with myself.